On the Day Before

I am suddenly compelled to take note of that which I'm thankful for in preperation for the holiday tomorrow. The first one here I mention because this is something much more prevalent this year. I am thankful for the well-being of myself and those around me. The aftermath of my mom's heart attack was difficult on me, both out of worry for her, and the constant and overwhelming questioning of both my mortality and the direction in which my life has gone. However in the grand scheme of things, all is well, and for that I am thankful.

The second, and to me most important, are my friends and family. I find it a bit ironic that as I type this, I've come across profiles of people that I haven't seen in a long time, but definitely would like to, And others still of people that are very close to me, yet still so very distant. Indeed the memories come flowing back. Anyway, to those that have known me for a long time, all I can say is that I love you all and for those I don't see all the time, I miss you. And to those that I've only recently gotten to know, you are an amazing group of people and I can't wait to get to know each and every one of you better.

So to all of you and those you will be spending the holiday with, Happy Thanksgiving.

What Kind of Day Has It Been?

It really is a good thing that I have had the past couple days off of work. I have been in a really bizarre mood. It is the combination of being somewhat happy, mildly depressed, and well, probably a few other things. The strangest thing about this mood is that if properly provoked (which probably would have happened had I been at work, or any number of other places), I will become incredibly arrogant. Instead I have kept to myself for the most part in an attempt to avoid this. That probably seems like a strange reaction, and I could explain it, but I'm not going to. All I know is that I need something to change very soon or I'm going to lose what little grip on sanity you all know I have. That is all for this very cryptic and nonsensical blog.

17 People

It is a fact that many of my friends know. I will do most anything as long as I am doing it with friends. However I have decided to remove one thing from that list, and that is getting drunk beyond all fucking reason. Yes, most of you are laughing right now, but seriously, I would have much rather stayed up late doing, well whatever was going on after I took my leave the party. It was a hell of a time though. However I don't know what was worse, drifting in and out of consciousness or having fragments of memory flitting into my mind throughout the next day. The few parts I do remember after initially passing out are enough to make me wonder what other brilliant things I decided to say. Anyway, there are only a few people that might read this that don't
already know more about that night than I do, so no point in writing anymore. Well whatever, no regrets :D

Well ok, a couple last thoughts. I learned that one can never completely thank the person that helps them through a night like that, especially after sorting through fragmented memories of conversations that were from what I can tell kinda interesting. Also, there is a underlying pattern to the titles of my blogs, so if they seem random, well, they aren't.

The Long Goodbye

So I just got back from a two day stay in Longview, my first trip back there in a few months. There are two things that stick out in my mind, and both require a little explanation first. First off, I got back Halloween night. For work I dressed up as what could most easily be described as a redneck. I did this mostly as an excuse to not wear my uniform. However since I left for Longview straight from work, I didn't bother to change out of the costume. It dawned on me that the problem with that is that where I was going, no one (except my family) would realize that I was in a costume at all.

Now the second thing. One of my more random skills is that I'm a pretty good dart thrower. Normally when I go back home, at least some time is spent at the Eagles lodge across the river in Rainier. If you don't know what an Eagles lodge is, look it up, I'm not getting into an explanation. Anyway I was throwing darts with my Mom, Grandma, and Grandpa. This was practice for them since they are all in a dart league. However my Grandma is new to it, and is still trying to learn the terminology and such. By pure coincidence, right as I'm about to throw my third dart one round, she asks one of the other people in the league for clarification on a phrase she heard....what I hear next is, "So a happy meal is when you score a 69, right." I froze then, unable to laugh nearly hard as would have been either necessary or appropriate.

And something that is happening down there that I didn't have the chance to face this trip is something that will in time become quite difficult. There is a reasonable chance that one of my Grandfathers has Alzheimer's, or at the very least one of any number of other afflictions of the mind. I know a few of you have experienced this, and this will be my 2nd time through, so there isn't much that need be said in explantion. At this point it is early and I can still be optimistic...

On a whole different topic, I had an interesting day at work recently. It is very common, as some of you reading this will know, for people to talk to me about anything and everything, even if they hardly know me. It is common for me to know a great deal about someone, yet they know little to nothing about me. However due to the nature of the activities we had at work (to those I work with, yes, I mean the LTS stuff), the roles we're reversed. I found it very interesting to see just how someone would react when going from knowing almost nothing about me, to learning about my life in a fairly good amount of detail. I suppose this stems from the fact that I will almost always answer any question asked about me, regardless of how personal it may be.